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20 January 2006 @ 12:51 am
holding out for heartbreak  
AND SO..the last few days of my life have been extremely chaotic and bizarre. I never got my stupid photos sent in, and by the looks of things I'm not gonna get my poems sent in either. Which sucks, because I have a really good chance of getting my shit published. I can't seem to prioritize lately--I've been staying up all night with my friends and falling asleep in class. I think every day this week I've just laid my head down on the desk and slept. It wouldn't be so bad, but I'm in the front row, right in the middle. Poor professor, he must feel horribly boring.
Me and Brett went to Panera, which is one of my favorite restaurants. Then we saw Hostel which was honestly the most fucked up movie I've seen in my life. I was so grossed out/enthralled/scared shitless that I curled up in his lap and buried my face in his neck. KINDA AWKWARD.
Desiree and Cassie are really upset about this guy Joe...and I feel really bad. I mean, I know how it feels to like someone who totally doesn't like you back...but it's impossible to just stop liking them. It's torture. But what's worse is that the whole situation is making them both feel unattractive, both physically and psychologically. Which isn't true..they're both very cute girls with sweet personalities!! It pisses me off when guys think they have the right to flirt with a girl, lead her to believe that he likes her, but just ditch her out of nowhere. Some people just don't have feelings. That's why I think a lot of people do drugs n shit...maybe to cover up emotions that they don't want to surface. I don't really do drugs really...I find other ways to cover up my emotions. Such as playing the piano (which I've gotten really good at, by the way), taking long walks at night, eating (I've gotten rather large), or exercising.
I want to pull an allnighter and get up early in the morning to work out, take a shower and get ready n shit, but I'm so tired right now that it probably won't happen, which sucks. Because I didn't work out today, and I ate at Panera.
Welllll it seems that Desiree and Cassie have decided to go to sleep in the lounge and have turned off the lights. Veronica's not in her room and I loathe sleeping alone. It's just a thing.
Current Mood: exhaustedexhausted
Current Music: Mad World :: Roland Orzabal